So I've had a pretty tough week. Isabella was on a great schedule for about 2 weeks (she'd go down around 7:30, wake up to eat at around 3am, then sleep until 6 ish), then for no reason whatsoever, she started fighting her sleep at bedtime and would wake up at 2 and then every. hour. after. Andy and I were like zombies for 3 days straight. I couldn't focus at work and fell really behind on my paperwork. I was up to 3 cups of coffee just to make it through the day and was in tears before bed because I was terrified of what the night would bring. Last night was better, she only woke up once even though it took us almost an hour to get her to bed.
However, I hate feeling like Johnny Rain Cloud. All of this negative energy is really starting to get to me because I'm not usually like this. So I decided to bring a little sunshine into my life and talk about the things that I'm grateful for:
I'm very lucky to have a healthy baby. The no sleeping sucks but it could be a million times worse. I don't have to go to sleep tonight wondering if my baby is going to wake up in the morning. She has a full life ahead of her and that's what it all boils down to. She's not in and out of hospitals. She's home with people who love her.
I'm so blessed to have my mom watch her or Andy when he's off during the week. A lot of people have to either lose a salary and stay home or pay for daycare and I feel so lucky that I don't have to. I know her needs are being met and she's with people who care about her and would never hurt her. And the best part is it's free.
I'm grateful to have a job. So many people are losing theirs or getting pay cuts and we don't have to struggle at all. We don't live like rockstars, but we're comfortable and we're able to give back whenever we can.
I'm lucky Isabella is completely covered on both of our insurances. I hear horror stories about insurance bills and I don't have to worry about that. I paid a $200 hospital fee and that was it.
Sometimes I get down, which I've forgiven myself for, and sometimes I complain, which IMO is necessary sometimes because if I don't vent I eat and get fat and no one wants that, but I have a lot to be grateful for. I'm very blessed in many ways.