Thursday, January 14, 2010

Instinct Parenting

I'm done with baby books! Done. I'm tired of reading that if my kid doesn't take two 2 hour long naps she's going to be some ADD serial killer. One book says that you should pick your baby up every time s/he cries. Another says, close the door and don't open it up until morning no matter what you hear. Another says, let the baby cry for 5 minutes, go in and soothe and then repeat. Another says check once and then let the baby cry. Not only do the authors of said baby books contradict each other, they contradict themselves. One book I read said not to let a baby under 8 weeks cry but then told success stories of the cry it out method with a 6 week old (too young IMHO). One author said not to try cry it out or controlled crying before 4 months, another said 3 months, and yet another said 6 months.


I am so done with these books. I think baby books are a great way to learn how your baby develops and how his or her body works and things they might be getting ready to try or experience, but other than that I'm trusting my gut. If it feels like it's OK I'm gonna stick with it, if it doesn't feel right I won't. I'm sick of thinking about what I'm "supposed" to do or what my friends are doing or what my family did.

I'm coming into my own as a mother and I know my child and I will follow my instincts and intuition despite what The Happiest Healthiest No Crying Ferberized Confident Baby on the Block says!

10 comments:

Rsgrl said...

Good for you! Only you know what is best for your child, E - even if you are a first time mom. We all are learning every day and the books just create more mommy guilt. And NONE of us need more of that!

Leannabanna said...

AMEN, Sister!! Could not have said it better myself!

Mrs.Andreazza said...

Every child is different, so it's definitely best to stick with your natural instincts. Only you truly know what is best for your baby!

PS. You have an "award" on my blog ;)

Sarah and Phil said...

I sooo agree with this. We read every book possible before having a baby and not a single one of them prepared us for Lillian. To hell with them :)

allycupe said...

Thanks for stopping by on my SITS day! I LOVED all the comment love and now I'm here to spread it around!

Sarah said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sarah said...

I am so with you on that! I never started with the books. People told me about them - and I thought they all sounded kind of nuts! So I'm with you.
Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!
xox

Mommy Taylor said...

Thanks for leaving a comment on my blog. :)

I definitely think it's best to follow your instincts. What works for one child might not work for another. Now that I've had two kids I completely get that now! Every thing I thought I knew about babies and that I learned from my first went out the window with baby number 2!

Quixotic said...

Absolutely!!! Nobody knows what's right for you and your baby like you do. By all means, read the books, get the developmental stuff and theories, maybe some new ideas or takes on things, but then pick what makes sense to you out,and ignore the rest.
More Mums should have the courage and support of others to just do what their instinct tells them.

Laura said...

OMGsh!!! I totally agree with this. AfreakingMEN!!! I put all my book in the garage when my daughter turned 3 months. I had HAD IT!!! :) I'm laura by the way, nice to meet you.

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