Saturday, April 17, 2010

Anxiety


As a brand spanking new mom I've faced tons of anxiety in my journey. How do I bathe this wriggly, slippery little nothing? Has she eaten enough? When is this skeevy belly button husk gonna fall off? We've all been there right? But now I'm facing a different kind of anxiety...hers.

When she was around 6 months or so, she went through a phase of stranger anxiety. She'd lose it if someone 3 blocks down so much as thought about looking at her. And I'm not talking about hiding her face in my neck, I'm talking an out and out meltdown. However, that quickly passed and now she'll happily let strangers talk to her and even touch and hold her (I'm not talking about strangers on the street here holding my kid, I mean people I know that are strangers to her).

However, now we have a different conundrum. Separation Anxiety. It started right after I went back to work after my heavenly 11 day vacation. She would cry whenever I left the room. But sometimes I need to leave the room. Like when I'm by myself at night and I need to draw her bath and get her bottle ready. I put her in her crib so she doesn't try to climb the walls and the second I'm out of the nursery I hear big loud cries. Also, on occasion I need to use the bathroom.

She doesn't want me to hold her or even play with her necessarily, what she wants is to see me. She doesn't give me a hard time in the morning when I leave I think because Andy is usually giving her a bottle or she's occupied with a toy or still asleep.

I'm hoping this passes quickly because it's a little, um, awkward trying to do your business with a squirming almost 10 month old.

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16 comments:

Desi said...

Liv went through this too! She has kind of stopped, but she has her moments of being a huge mama's girl and only wanting me. Its definitley frustrating though...especially when you need to do something like wash bottles or use the bathroom. I just think of it as a compliment hahah :)

Ma What's 4 dinner said...

This too shall pass. The first child always ends up being the best at the separation anxiety thing, it didn't last long at all with him. In fact on his first day of preschool he just turned and looked at me and said "Bye Mom." in that ok, you need to go now voice.

My middle child had the biggest meltdowns. But now my littlest is going through it. It shouldn't last long and it's way harder on mom than anyone else. Just know as soon as you're about 5 minutes away she's probably moved on...sigh.

Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!

Alex aka Ma What's For Dinner
www.mawhats4dinner.com

Ma What's 4 dinner said...

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Southern Loves said...

I feel like my son is going to have the same problem. Is it normal that I'm already seeing signs at 7 weeks?? Ha Ha...My daughter went through it for like a week because she's such a social butterfly, so I totally understand your anxiety!! I say I would be okay with it this go around, knowing that I'm my little boy's #1, but you are so right...it makes it nearly impossible getting anything done!! I'm already experiencing that!! ;-D

Leannabanna said...

Yep, Brody is that way now too. Its awful at times. He does not want me to leave or even leave his side, but he does not want me to hold him either. Its like I have to be on top of him while he plays to make him content. Good luck.... I too, hope this stage passes as quickly as the fear of strangers did!

Kathy said...

Be patient, it lasts a while. Mine Lily is 14 months and it's still going strong. If I go out to the car to get something, there are full blown tears. I just tell myself "enjoy it now, because soon enough, she won't even notice I'm gone".

Kisha said...

This is absolutely common at this age. Both my girls went through it right at the 9-12 month stage, and I've heard about it from so many other moms too. You kind of just have to wait it out, try to ignore it, maybe a bit of tough love. Once she sees that it doesn't bother you as much, and that you always come back, this too will pass.

Therese said...

Oh it doesn't just tug the heart strings it snaps them!! Plus it is annoying. I feel for you, we are in the same boat over here...

Amber said...

We are just starting to go through this... good luck.

~Amber @ The Mom Road

Sunday said...

If it makes you feel any better this behavior is totally normal.
Still, quite frustrating, but thankfully, normal.

Mrs.F said...

Gianna went through this for a few weeks, but it seems to have passed already. When she is really tired in the evening all she want is me though... she'll start screaming if Hubbs has her & she catches a glimpse of me trying to sneak out for a minute!

Sarah said...

My daughter went through that at around the same time. Don't worry. She will get through it! Mine is 13 months now. And, thankfully, I can leave the room or the vicinity no problem. Hang in there!

Anne - Mommy Has to Work said...

I think it hurts me more than my daughter, but it does get better with time, like alot of things. following you back for a few friday ago.

Shaunells Hair said...

OH, I remember those days. I think that's why moms get so smart, or brain-dead, take your pick. Because we have to constantly figure out how to do things with wrenches thrown in the mix. It's a super job though, right! :)

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Hello! I'm Kate. said...

Oh yes! We are in this stage & it started for us at 6 months!!! And now, he won't let my husband & I touch. We can't hold hands, we can't sit next to each other, we can't hug or he FLIPS out! And he pushes us away from each other & then cries for me to hold him! My mom promises me this is normal & that all 5 of her kiddos did this, but it's a little overwhelming right now!

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