Sometimes when I look at my daughter I don't swell with pride and love, I sag with doubt. I am far from perfect, I have many flaws. How will my inadequacies affect Isabella?
We've all been out and about, a party maybe or the grocery store, perhaps out to dinner when someone else's unruly children are running amok. They won't listen and you can just see the despair on their poor parents face. I don't want to be that parent! I can handle 24 third graders without a problem, but what if I fail my daughter? What if I'm at work when she's supposed to be learning her manners? What if I feel so guilty about the time I don't spend with her that I slack off on my discipline and she's that kid at the party/restaurant/grocery store that is making everyone else thank their lucky stars she's not theirs?
I never doubt my love for her or my desire to raise her the right way, but what if that desire isn't enough? What if all those textbooks from college and grad school that are filled with developmental theories and strategies for discipline are actually only good for collecting dust (as I suspected when I bought them none-of-your-business years ago, for a hundred bucks a pop).
Do you ever doubt your parenting abilities or do you just trust that it will all work out in the end? Please tell me I'm not the only one with these insecurities.