Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Childcare Woes

Since my mom is going through chemo and isn't strong enough to take care of Isabella we've had to seriously consider our childcare options since she was Isabella's main care giver while Andy and I worked. We are very fortunate that Andy has a rotating schedule so he has time off during the week where he can watch her and my sister is wonderfully forfeiting her two days off (Monday and Tuesday) to watch her. But we're still short 5 days a month and since I'm assuming it would be illegal to throw a sippy cup and a bowl of cheerios on the floor and let her fend for herself on those days we had to look into day care.

We went to a bunch but have ultimately decided on Children of America. It fits in with our budget, I loved the director, and I really liked her teachers and the room she would be in and it is equipped with webcams. So if any of you have any insights on Children of America, good, bad, first, or second hand I'd really appreciate it.

So intellectually I know that millions of parents use day care and that she'll have fun socializing with other kids and will engage in fun group projects but emotionally this is tearing me apart. What if she gets scared in the middle of the day and wonders where I am? What if she won't nap on those little cots? What if she cries? What if they're mean to her? What if she feels abandoned? I'm really very nervous about it and we don't start until November so I have several weeks for my fears to grow. I think I'm going to go back and take another look around just because in my mind it's slowly morphing from a bright, sunny school to a dungeon when I know that's not the case, well intellectually I know that's not the case.

There's also the money situation. Andy and I had a budget all set up that we would be saving $300 a month for a bigger house so that we could hopefully be out of our townhouse and into a bigger home in a few years and then we could start trying to have another baby. Well now all of that extra money has to go to day care. Additionally, since Andy will be watching her during the week as well, he can't pick up any overtime shifts on weekdays, only on weekends which will be cutting into our family time. But what can we do? With money going out on day care we can't turn down overtime shifts since that's the only way we can pad our savings.

It's just a shitty situation all around. If you guys could share your day care experience or if you have any tips on helping with the transition I'd love to hear it.

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For the Love of Naps - Sarah said...

Charley went to an in-home daycare...out of a ladies house. Loved it. It was like a second family. I think the centers can be a bit overwhelming, but you don 'thave to worry about them calling in sick, there are many to help with the hard kids or hard days, and there are other parents coming and going all day. Our centers around here are WAY more expensive than the in-home options. It is hard. Go do some pop in visits. You will probably see that she loves it. You just have to give her some time to get adapted to the new routine. Daycare providers are amazing people- they have the ability to get MANY little ones to nap on cots etc. Good luck! Thinking of you!

ShorT1882 said...

It's so MIL was supposed to be our childcare and backed out last minute. We were lucky that I didn't have to send Evie til almost 10 months and at that age and beyond I feel like they get so much more out of the interaction with others. It was hard leaving her the first few days and see tears but honestly within 4 days she was fine and playing as I left. Granted, no one will be as loving and attentive as mommy but as long as you are happy with the center you chose it WILL be ok I promise! It's an adjustment for you both but think of all the little projects Isabella will be able to do and friends she'll make :-) Money was a huge adjustment here too and being that it's a last minute change it may be tough at first but you will figure it out. Good luck!!

Desi said...

Liv was only in daycare for a short time. She didn't start going until she was probably 7 or 8 months. She had a total meltdown the first time I dropped her off. It got better and better every day and after a week or two Liv didn't even care when I left her. In fact, when we didn't have a need for daycare any longer I was dissapointed she couldn't still go. It was really good for her. I will definitley be putting Liv in daycare again. I hope that you have a positive experience like I did!

UrbanGypsy said...

Day care can be a good experience for everyone. It will teach her that no matter what, Mommy ALWAYS comes back. That's a powerful lesson. And she will make friends and interact with will be much harder emotionally on you than it will be on her. Don't worry - any day care that has webcams is stellar in my book. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

Mrs. P said...

Ugh I am so sorry you are dealing with this... your mom's illness and the daycare nightmare. I wish I lived closer because I would totally help you out! (((hugs))) I hope it all works out... I used to work at a daycare, and while I know there are "dungeons" out there, I was very lucky to work for a great center and I LOVED seeing the kiddos every day!

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