Saturday, September 11, 2010

Guest Blogging with Monday Morning

Since I've been back to work, which I'm going to be writing about just as soon as I pull my head out of my ass, I've been really busy and am having a bit of difficulty easing into my routine. Never one to have people suffer at my expense, Teresa from Monday Morning has offered to write up a guest post for you to enjoy. Teresa and I are friends in real life and have known each other for the better part of 2 decades. You can read more about Teresa by visiting her blog and reading her guest post.

***This post does come with a warning. Teresa is a lovely young girl who went to Catholic school her entire life but, God love her, has the mouth of a truck driver so just be careful who is looking over your shoulder.**

Holy Shit-balls Batman, I’m a guest blogger. How the hell did this happen?!

I guess I’ll start by introducing myself… I’m Teresa from Monday Morning and I use my blog to write about disagreeable topics that will make you love me, or hate me. Either way, I’m fucking happy. So let get right to it….

A few friends and myself are heading to Las Vegas the end of September. As much as I want to say we’ll be four wild and crazy single ladies living it up in Sin City, we’re not all single. Actually, all but one is currently in a relationship.

My fried D, who is coming to Vegas, calls me the other day to tell me that her boyfriend’s dumb ass friends are giving him shit about ‘allowing’ her go to Vegas. WHAT?! Where the fuck do these assholes come off?!

I mean, honestly, lets all use 100% of our brainpower here. If I have nights out with my girl friends right here in NYC without my boyfriend, what’s the difference if I go out with my girl friends in Vegas? If I really wanted to cheat on my boyfriend I don’t need to go all the way to Vegas to do it. There are equally hot pieces of ass right where I live, I don’t need to spend $600 to fly to the other end of the country. And any nerd that thinks The Hangover is the accurate portrayal of Las Vegas then I’m going to safely assume your dumb enough to think Spiderman is building spider webs in the middle of Manhattan right now.

On the other hand, I know why men don’t think that we can go out and have a Dick free night. When they go out all they think about is Vagina and how they are going to get it and bring it home later. Therefore they can’t believe that when we go out we’re not always on the hunt for Dick. Women don’t think about Dick 24 hours 7 days a week. Seriously, we would rather shop and talk about shoes then be concerned about where to find the nearest Dick all the time.

Temptation is everywhere! Right in your town, in your grocery store, possibly right the fuck next door. What can you do about it?! Absolutely nothing. There is nothing you can do people! Therefore let your girlfriend travel half across the world, or let your husband go to the raunchy bachelor party, because cheating is a state of mind it’s not about location.

I thought this was obvious but apparently not. Don’t worry that’s why I’m here to share the common sense that I was blessed with.


I would also like to acknowledge that today is September 11th and I would like to remember all the lives that were touched so many years ago.

"So bless New York's finest, our angels in blue.
Giving us hope and helping us through.
And bless New York's bravest, the FDNY, giving their sweat and their tears and their lives.

And bless all the medics and our troops overseas,
And the guys in the hardhats removing debris.
Bless the everyday people who answered the call.
Bless those who gave some, and those who gave all.

And bless all the souls who left us this year.
You may be gone, but you'll always be here. "

Shilelagh Law

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Dee said...

Yep she definitely went to Catholic school. I my case my hubby says my mouth is like that of a sailor.

So glad you visited my blog.

tenille-help-mum said...

I went to an Anglican school, and my husband says that my mouth would put some of the air-force mechanics he used to work with to shame.

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