Saturday, December 11, 2010

Let Me Make You An Offer

Andy and I were just kind of casually talking about when we want to have another kid and when we want to move when he said to me, "We can move further South and you can stay home till both kids are in school."  I just kind of gave him the side eye because, while I love my husband dearly, he's a cheap bastard plain and simple.  Losing an entire salary is enough to send him into cardiac arrest.  He quickly said that it was just a thought and we would talk more about it in the future.

But it got me thinking, because everything gets me thinking, and I don't know if that would be something that I would want.  I don't want to move further away from my friends and family.  I love having the support of my sister and I like being able to help my mom out when she needs me.  I like that I can hop in the car and drive 45 minutes (off peak hours of course) to see my friends and for Isabella to see her cousins.  I don't know if I can remove myself even further than I already am from my support system.  I'd have no help and no company and I'd be home all day alone.

I also love my job.  I'm in a great position as a Reading Teacher when out of classroom positions are hard to come by and I really don't want to give that up.  I like making my own money and feeling independent.  I'm also very good at what I do.  And while I'm severely underpaid, my salary allows us to book trips to Disney World (see you July 2011), go out to dinner, spend a weekend away, buy new clothes/toys or whatever we need.  I don't know how I would feel giving up that extra security.

I feel guilty for the aforementioned reasons but that's the cold hard truth.

On the other hand, I'd have two kids who I could be there for all day.  Isabella will probably be in school and I would have a little baby to take care of, so there would be lots of exciting things that I would miss if I were working.  I think I'm actually going to listen to Andy for once and not worry about it until it's time to have a serious conversation about it.
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Desi said...

Well I'm on the same page as you. I am unable to work yet in Canada and while my husband is totally capable of supporting our family, I miss having my own income. I feel guilty buying things for just myself. So, I definitley know where you are coming from. said...

Hi! I've hopped over from the weekend hop. I had the same problem too years ago... I understand how you feel. I have added myself as your newest follower on GFC .
I'm off to snoop around your blog now. Please drop by and maybe follow me if you fancy a laugh. I'd be delighted to welcome you.
Warmest wishes
Carol from

Kelli said...

We just did it..sort of. We only moved 2 hours South of our family. I work part-time and the move will allow me to continue to do that. It allows Hanna to be in a great day care and for us to do the things we want and couldn't necessarily afford in NJ. It is sometimes difficult being away from our friends and family but the weekend visits are a lot of fun. We plan things to do; things we wouldn't normally do if we lived closer to one another.

Good luck with whatever decision you make!

PearlsAndGreenTea said...

Haha...I love your inner dialogue. Sounds a lot like mine except I usually bring up these concerns to hubbie way before I even need to. I was an elementary school teacher too and now I'm a stay at home mom. I have to say I absolutely love it! About moving away, don't do it! My family lives in Asia and it's incredibly difficult to be away from them, especially after having a baby. Also, I had 2 close girlfriends move to different states. They both have toddlers and are having an incredibly hard time being away from their friends and family.


Teresa said...

just so you know i would not be happy if andy took you and isabella further away from me. it's hard enough to see you guys!

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