Melissa vs. Eclipsed

I've used "Eclipsed" as every screen name I've ever had. I almost feel as though it's become another identity; another person. Sometimes I wish I could be more like the persona of Eclipsed. Eclipsed isn't afraid to say exactly what's on her mind, she's witty, open, and honest. Melissa, on the other hand, is way more reserved. I definitely have a difficult time asking for what I need and telling people exactly what I think. The anonymity, for lack of a better word, of the e-world affords me some leeway to say exactly what's on my mind that I could never say in real life.

I would never go into a room with 280+ people in it and declare in front of everyone that I love a good poop, but I totally did that in front of all of you. I would never complain for weeks on end to everyone I saw about my child's lack of sleep for her first 4 months of life, yet I prattled on here about it (and if you stuck with me through that shit storm and didn't get sick of it I applaud you).

I think I need to bring a little bit of Eclipsed's ballsiness into my real life. Although, maybe I'll keep the poop details to myself.

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The Winners of I Heart Bacteria Are...

Imavera and Chrysanthemum. I'll be contacting you via e-mail once I get the terror in bed for your mailing addresses. Congrats!

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Featured Little Blogger: Hoping for Hunter

Week 5 of Helping the Little Guy is here and I'm thrilled to be writing about Jrzymeeba from Hoping for Hunter. Her blog title says it all. Hunter and his twin brother Parker were born at 26 weeks gestation and sadly Parker was just too precious for this world. But there was Hope for Hunter. This mother's strength is awe inspiring. She has gone through hell and back and is providing the best care for her now 7 month old son Hunter. Go and let her know that as a mother you feel for her and if you want to continue on with her in her journey follow her and tell her that you found her through the Helping the Little Guy project.

"There is no footprint so small that it can't leave an imprint on this world" Click HERE to read about Parker's passing and feel his parent's love.

If you want to be a part of this project e-mail me and I'll add you to the list.

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Pathology Results

I posted recently about my mom getting diagnosed with early stage colon cancer. We got the pathology results back and it's looking like she's going to be needing 6 months of chemo. When I first found out, about 2 weeks ago, it felt like the breath had been knocked out of my life. Would she be sick? Would she be bed ridden? Would my vibrant mother fade away?

And on another, more selfish note, what would we do for child care? Day care plus the high cost of my commute is too expensive. I couldn't afford to take an entire year off. What are we going to do? So many questions, so many uncertainties. I could take a FMLA if I needed too for 12 weeks although that would cripple us financially.

Some good friends at work are trying to talk me off the ledge. I don't know how often she'll need to go to chemo or how it will affect her. I just don't know anything. I'm keeping my mouth shut in regards to work right now because it makes my head spin to think about it.

Thank God Andy has rotating days off so he can watch her a lot during the week and my sister offered to pitch in on her days off (monday and tuesday) and my in laws offered to make up the one day a week we were short, but I hate to have my baby girl shuttled and passed around. It could work for a few months but probably not indefinitely. I'm trying not to think that far ahead. I'm trying to focus my energy on my mom and being there for her. We go to the oncologist in a few days so hopefully I'll have some answers, or at least a better grasp of the situation, then.

As always, thank you for your continued prayers and support. Your comments, e-mails, and tweets have really helped to brighten my spirits and make me feel less alone.

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Dear Thighs

Dear Thighs,

I am rip roaring mad at you. YOU did not carry a baby around for 9 months. YOU did not need to expand and grow to accommodate a tiny human being. Therefore there is no need for you to have, um, "spread out" so much. You see I have a fat sucking bathing suit to deal with my belly, ass, and hips...however there is no head to toe thigh sucking bathing suit. Now that the pregnancy weight is gone and my belly has gone down to normal, maybe not skinny, but normal, you refuse. You have fared the worst on this pregnancy and without merit. So stop jiggling, stop the sit down thigh spread, and start getting back into shape. I swear to God above that I will run you to death on the treadmill and the elliptical machine until you comply with my orders, kthanks.

xoxo,

Fat Thigh Girl

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1st Birthday Pics

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I Heart Bacteria T-Shirt Giveaway from Culturelle

When you're digestive tract works properly the improvement to your overall health is amazing. Not only just your immune system but it does wonders for your hair as well (ya know if you're vain like me). Culturelle is a probiotic supplement that helps to promote a healthy digestive and immune system. It contains 10 billion Lactobacillus GG, which is a fancy pants word for good bacteria that maintains a healthy balance in your digestive system.

Additionally, it is the most researched probiotic supplement on the market so you know it's safe. It's also wheat and gluten free and completely natural. It is available both for kids and adults. And let me tell you something about the people at Culturelle, they are funny and I love me some funny. They have a great sense of humor about their product. You have to watch this video it is short, cute and really funny. http://www.youtube.com/BacteriaHero

Wasn't that worth the 25 seconds? You can read more about Culturelle by clicking HERE. You can become a fan of Culturelle on Facebook by clicking HERE and you can follow Culturelle on Twitter by clicking HERE. I started my 30 day supplement yesterday and I'm super jazzed up about it. So in 30 days you can expect my review and also a few updates on the way.

Now for the fun stuff. Culturelle is giving away 2 I Heart Bacteria T-Shirts to my readers you lucky ducks.

Rules of Entry (Make sure you leave one comment for each entry)

1. Mandatory Entry: Follow my blog publicly or tell me that you already do so (1 entry)

2. Follow Culturelle on twitter by clicking HERE (1 entry)

3. Tell me why you think Culturelle might be something you are interested in (1 entry)

4. Follow me on Twitter by clicking HERE (1 entry)

5. Leave a comment on any of the Featured Blogger's Blog (1 entry per blog)

6. Blog about this giveaway (5 entries)

7. Tweet about this entry (1 entry)

8. Grab my button or tell me you already have it (2 entries)

9. Tell me what you think about the Bacteria Hero video linked above (2 entries)

10. Vote for me on Top Mommy Blogs

Make sure you leave your e-mail in with your mandatory entry if it's not linked in your profile. Good luck!

This giveaway will run until midnight on 6/29 and if you want some fab coupons click HERE, HERE, and HERE.

____________________CLOSED_____________________________________

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Featured Little Blogger: Doula Ambitions

I've had ants in my pants all week waiting to feature Emily at Doula Ambitions for week 4 of Helping The Little Guy project because she knows a lot, like a boat load, about birth. She's an aspiring doula and a medical anthropologist. She has an amazing post about Pregnancy Beliefs Around the World. So if you're as obsessed with pregnancy, birth and babies as I am check her out and show her some love. You'll enjoy a fresh perspective and I promise you that you will learn something new. Comment and let her know that you found her through the Helping the Little Guy project. Remember, we were all new once.

If you want to be a part of the project just send me an e-mail and I'll add you to the list.

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Her Year In Pictures

Today is Isabella's first birthday. And I am a mix of emotions. I'm torn between marveling how this little person has grown and developed in a mere 12 months and wishing I could slow down time. She's developed physically in so many ways, but she's also developed quite the personality. She is determined as all hell; if she wants something there is no getting in her way or distracting her from her course. She's so outgoing. She smiles and shows off to anyone who will look at her. She started walking about a week ago, which is so amazing to see. She looks like a little Frankenstein and she is just so pleased with herself.

She takes two 1 hour naps and sleeps at night from 7 pm to anywhere between 6 and 7 am (sometimes our alarms will wake her up at 6). She says mommy, dada, baby, baba, bye bye, cookie, and Ni (for Ni Hao Kai Lan).

I'm also amazed at my own growth. I feel like I've really come into myself as a mother. I've gone from being so indecisive, wishy-washy, and self-critical to knowing what to do and how to care for my daughter (except of course for when I have no fricken idea, which still totally happens). So here's my little girl's journey from tiny baby to my big one year old.

Oh and expect a boatload of pictures from her princess themed birthday party later!

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Life Before Baby

Some people will tell you that they don't remember what life was like before they had a baby, I'm not one of those people. I remember exactly what my life was like before I had Isabella and if I could go back in time I'd smack myself for taking it for granted.

I remember what it was like to wake up on a Saturday morning and ease into my day...no cryng/fussing/babbling baby waking me up at the ass crack of dawn. The whole day was splayed before me. Maybe I would clean, maybe I would go and lounge by the pool, maybe I'd call up my girlfriends and see if they wanted to get together for dinner, maybe I would spend the day in my pj's luxuriously drinking coffee and watching The Real Housewives of the OC marathon. I could do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted.

I remember what it was like to pick out an outfit for myself and have it fit perfectly. No flabby skin, no worries about it getting spit up on, no worries about money to buy a new one if I didn't like it.

I remember what it was like to get a phone call from one of my friends on a Friday night asking me if I wanted to go out for drinks on Saturday and I would say sure. I didn't need 3 days notice. Sometimes I would come home from work tired and lazy and Andy would say, "Hey you wanna just go out to eat, maybe go see a movie?" I remember when dinner and a movie was no big deal, now it's like a giant date night.

I remember what it was like to leave the house in under five minutes. Just grab my purse and go, there was no carefully calculating the best exit strategy based on naps. There was no giant diaper bags to lug around, no provisions that needed to be planned for hours in advance.

I would never want to go back to a world where Isabella doesn't exist because she's my world now, but I'd be lying to your face if I told you that I didn't miss it sometimes.

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Lisa Leonard Gift Certificate Winner

Is JennLovesAustin from Two Isn't Enough. Congrats! I have contacted you via e-mail. Thanks to all who entered.

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Product Review: Kikou From Calm The Crazy

If you're anything like me just trying to get out the door can be enough to generate a mini panic attack. I can't count the number of times I've been completely dressed and ready to go to work/a party/the store and I either get spit up on, drooled on, or snotted on. Nothing puts a kink in your schedule then having to do a wardrobe change when you're already running on mom time (re: 15 minutes behind schedule). Not to mention stains that come with feeding children who think it's a super fun game to mush their food around and touch you with those chubby puree stained fingers.

The Kikou from Calm The Crazy is a perfect solution to life's little messes. It is a stylish wrap that completely protects your clothing. It has a super absorbent cotton outer layer and a waterproof lining. It has a simple wrap design so you don't mess up your hair and makeup, velcro coin closure in the front, and a wrap around tie at the waist. It's super durable and easy to clean. Not to mention it comes in a variety of adorable styles and it can also dub as a nursing cover.

I love mine. It has simplified my life in so many ways. I use it to feed Isabella her dinner when I get home from work, I wear it in the morning as I'm feeding her her bottle, I use it when she's eating one of those uber messy teething biscuits and has yuck all over her, I use it at bath time when she's splashing around like a fish and soaking my gym clothes so I walk into the gym looking like a drowned rat, and I even used it while I was making dinner to keep my clothes clean since it's easier to put on then an apron. I cannot say

enough good things about the Kikou.

Life is crazy. The Kikou brings a little calm. Meredith from Calm the Crazy is generously offering the first 10 commenters 10% off a Kikou. Jump on that offer because this product is incredible. I'm ordering one for my pregnant best friend and I had two cousins asking about it.

Meredith, the founder of Calm the Crazy, is a mom herself and if there's one thing I love to do is support and help other moms. So if the Kikou is something you'd be interested in go

and visit Meredith and let her know how awesome she is.

Disclosure: I did receive a sample of the Kikou at no cost in order to provide an honest review. The thoughts and opinions stated in this post are mine and mine alone. I did not receive and cash compensation for this review and I stand behind its honesty.

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Featured Little Blogger: The Adventures of Candy Graham

Week 3 of Helping The Little Guy Project brings me to a great blogger who, if you're as shallow as I am, will love her based solely on her header. It's Miss Candy from The Adventures of Candy Graham. She has 3 beautiful children and she is so open in her struggles and whatever she is going through that you can't help rooting for her. She does so much to create special moments for her kids. She has this great post about The All American Weekend and I love every bit of it. Please go and show her some bloggy love and support, remember we all want our voices heard and sometimes we just need a little help.

If you'd like to be part of this project send me an e-mail and I will add you to the list.

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The Power of Prayer

I really believe that if enough people pray or send out positive vibes in regards to a certain person or situation that mountains can be moved. Whether you believe in God, Buddah, or a greater Source I want to thank you all for your support, prayers, and well wishes. My mom had surgery today and it went very well. They were able to remove the mass in its entirety and it doesn't look like it spread but we'll have the biopsy results at the beginning of next week and that will let us know if she needs chemo or not. I cannot thank you enough for your outpouring of love for me and my family.

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The "C" Word

There's something about the word "Cancer" that is completely leveling. It can knock the wind right out of you and bring you to your knees. It doesn't matter if it's surrounded by words like "95% survival rate" or "we caught it early," it's still the ugliest word you can imagine. So when I found out this week that my mom was diagnosed with colon cancer I was basically reduced to a puddle of tears on the floor.

Not only is my mom my best friend and my rock, she's also watches Isabella on the days that Andy works. She hangs out with us on the weekends. She lets Andy and me go on dates. My entire world has been ripped out from under me. I see what it's like now not to have help. To be completely alone.

She's scheduled to have surgery tomorrow to remove the mass in her colon. They'll then be able to tell if it's spread to the surrounding lymph nodes. Best case scenario, they remove the mass, no spreading, no chemo. Worst case, it spread and they need to do chemo and possibly a colostony bag. We just don't know right now.

And then I feel selfish because I'm worried that if she's not well enough to watch Isabella in September when I go back to work, what the hell am I going to do? Day care is expensive and when you combine it with the ridiculous amount I pay in tolls and gas commuting to nyc everyday I don't know if it would be worth it. But taking out my entire salary would cripple us. Andy says I'm thinking too far ahead, to just wait and see. Waiting and seeing has never been my strong point.

There's more I want to say. There's more that I'm feeling. But I'm exhausted and my brain wants to shut off. So that's it for now. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

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Housework

I used to be a cleanie. Before baby, I would invite you to eat your chicken and potato off my floor. It sounds gross but my house was that clean. Now, when I can barely find the time to shower let alone scrub the floors, I'm torn as to how to keep my house in relative order. I've got some tips and tricks that I'm willing to share with you just so long as you share them right back ;)

I try to do a deep clean once a week during one of Isabella's naps. It's a relative deep clean, just disinfecting things, using a mop and bucket instead of the swiffer, sweeping under all the cushions etc.

I clean one room at a time or else I get overwhelmed.

I don't bother putting toys away until after she's gone to bed. There's really no point to it.

I delegate. I force Andy to help me out. He knows I can't put out if I'm stressed out about dishes in the sink.

Ok, so now I expect full discloser on how you keep your homes in relative order so I can steal them.

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Lisa Leonard Gift Certificate Giveaway

If you don't know who Lisa Leonard is you don't know what you're missing. Lisa Leonard makes the most amazing hand made and inspiring jewelry I've ever seen. She makes beautiful custom necklaces and bracelets that can be personalized with initials, dates, and names (everything is hand hammered) and she also has great gifts for dad including key rings and cuff bracelets.

She has so very graciously offered to give one of my readers a $40 gift certificate to her website. I am green with envy over the winner since her jewelry is so whimsical and beautiful! So let's get down to business.

Rules of Entry (remember leave one comment per entry)

1. Visit Lisa Leonard's website lisaleonardonline.com and tell me your favorite item (warning, it will be very difficult to choose) (1 entry)

2. Follow my blog publicly or leave a comment telling me that you already do so (1 entry)

3. Follow Lisa Leonard on twitter @lisaleonard (1 entry)

4. Follow me on twitter (1 entry)

5. Grab my button or tell me you already have it (1 entry)

6. Tweet about this giveaway. Make sure you leave your twitter address (1 entry)

7. Blog about this entry providing links to both my blog and Lisa Leonard's website (5 entries)

8. Comment on either this week's or last week's Featured Little Guy Blogger (see tab in header) (1 entry).

9. Vote for me on top mommy blogs (1 entry)

Remember to leave your e-mail address in one entry if it is not linked in your profile. This giveaway will run from June 8, 2010 - June 15, 2010. I will use a random number generator to choose the winner and will notify them by e-mail that they are the luckiest person ever. Good luck!

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Featured Little Blogger: The Lady Is In

I am so excited for week 2 of Helping the Little Guy project because Lady Gray from The Lady is...In has been with me from the get go. She and I met on a message board when I was just trying to get pregnant and I had a girl crush almost instantly. Seriously the girl is beautiful, not just "Oh that girl is really pretty" but "I am refusing to stand next to her in pictures" kinda pretty. Not only is she gorgeous but she's so sweet and funny and I'm glad to call her my friend, which 2 years later (God has it been that long?) she's still in my life. Ok enough gushing.

Lady Gray has such a unique niche in mommy land. She's an actress with an adorable baby boy named Elliot. It's so fascinating to read about what goes on behind the scenes of a stage production and how she balances everything. So go and visit her and show her some love. Comment and follow if you like her as much as I do.

If you would like to be part of this project send me an e-mail and I will add you to the list.

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Over Parenting

I was sitting around shooting the shit with my mom the other day and she was teasing me about how Isabella has a sound machine. She went on to tell me that when I was a baby not only did I not have a car seat, but that she smoked during her entire pregnancy (she assured me they didn't know how bad it really was back in the day). And she never read one baby book. It's a wonder I survived with all my limbs! Which led me to the idea that sometimes we just over parent.

I'll be the first to admit that I'm a research mama. I read books (although they usually just annoy me and I wind up disregarding them), I search blogs, google, and ask anyone who will listen to try and solve the particular problem I'm trying to wrap my mind around. I read books to my unborn baby when I was pregnant, and I cried when I had to stop breast feeding due to low supply after an 11 hour day (see I feel the need to explain that to you) because I was sure that I was going to mess my kid up.

Sometimes we need to just let our kids be kids. Don't toss out the car seats and light up a cigg by any means, but maybe lighten up in other areas. Maybe I don't need to try and stuff veggies down my kid's throat by hiding them in anything that Isabella will eat (re: covered in cheese) and just continue to offer it to her and let her make her own decisions. Instead of hovering over her as she couch walks maybe I can hang back a bit and if she falls on her bum, so what...she'll survive. Maybe my mother actually knows a thing or two about mothering ;)

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Time

I operate on "Mom Time" meaning that if you send me an e-mail on Monday and I get back to you by Thursday I want to pour myself a celebratory glass of champagne for completing such a daunting task in such a timely manner.

But seriously y'all why is there so much to be done and not nearly enough time to do it in! (I feel like I can't just gloss over the fact that I just used the word "y'all", you see I'm from the east coast and I kind of sound like a more nasaly version of Marissa Tomei a la My Cousin Vinny, so it doesn't jibe in my everyday vernacular, but in bloggy land y'all can't hear what I really sound like).

When I get home from work I have to make dinner, undertake the daunting task of getting my kid to eat something that isn't comprised solely of carbs and cheese, give a bath and bottle, go to the gym, straighten up, make my lunch for the next day, set up my coffee pot, shower (sometimes), and go to bed. How I fit it in I'll never know, but I need like an extra 3 hours just to squeeze in time to blog, read your blogs, and maybe hang out with Andy. Sometimes I feel like my life is just running over because there just isn't enough time. Not enough time to catch up with friends (both real and electronic), catch up on my dvr, or God-forbid read a book that doesn't involve cardboard pages. Mom's should be allowed 1 extra hour a day for whatever it is they need to do.

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Winner of the Pillowcase Dress

is....Desi over at Olivia Caroline. Congratulations. Your e-mail wasn't linked in your profile so if you could either e-mail it to me or leave it in a comment that would be great. Then I'll be able to put you in touch with Mommy So Sweet so you can set up the details. You have 48 hours to contact me with your e-mail. Congrats girl!

Mommy So Sweet has so graciously offered 10% off to everyone who entered the contest which is so awesome. You have all been e-mailed with the code. There is one e-mail that I couldn't find (wasn't on the blog or in profile) so if you haven't received the e-mail please let me know and I'll make sure to get the code out to you.

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