Friday, January 7, 2011

Raising a Brat

My kid is a brat.  Or rather she acts like a brat.  She's really kind of sweet, charming, funny, and smart as a whip, but if you weren't her mother you would say she's a brat.  Her favorite game is "mess".  This is where she takes a giant bag of blocks, dumps them out, and throws them everywhere all while maniacally shrieking "mess, oh hi mess".  She knows I get mad when she throws her food on the floor, so she holds it between her tiny fingers over the edge of the table, looks at me, and throws it on the floor.  Then she says, "bad, bad, bad" to herself and then does it again.  Her favorite word is "no".  Isabella do you want to take a bath?  NO.  It's time for a nap.  NO.  Sometimes she says no when I know she wants it.  Isabella do you want cookies?  NO, oh YES.  Sometimes she says no when I haven't even made a request from her.  I love your picture Isabella.  NO.  WTF?

I'm not quite sure where I went wrong or how I can de-brattify her.  I'm hoping it's just some sort of phase and that she'll stop shrieking like some sort of wildebeast when I don't let her eat the bag of chocolate chips.  Maybe she'll grow out of it or maybe she's destined to spend the better part of her formative years in a time out.

I just don't want to be "that mom" with the wild kid who doesn't listen, doesn't understand the meaning of the word no, and is a giant pain in the ass.  I don't want people to look at my kid and see some sort of terror.  I want them to see the little girl who will ask to hold your hand, who will curl up on your lap with her favorite book, the girl who loves to sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, the girl who will dance until you're on the floor laughing.  It's hard to see that when she's throwing herself on the floor bucking like a bull because she, in fact, wants to sit in a poopy diaper instead of having me change it.
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12 comments:

Saucy B said...

That's a tough stage and very frustrating for any mom. My guy is 5 now and it really does get better as they get older and you can reason more with them. Stay strong and fight the good fight mama! ;-)

Erica said...

I feel you because Im going through this for the past 2 yrs since my now 3 yr old was one....with no end in sight......Im at a loss sometimes. Her dad thinks its me ....but its really not :(

Resourceful Red said...

Maybe its just a stage?
I am sure she and you will get thru it (not as soon as you might like).
You won't have that bratty kid for long ;)

Emily said...

I am reading Einstein Never Used Flashcards. There is a whole chapter on this phase. Which is so frustrating! I really recommend borrowing it from the library or getting it from amazon because it's really insightful and written by child development researchers.

And I'm so not one to throw book recomendations around willy nilly.

UrbanGypsy said...

I know you've gotten lots of advice but - I think she does know the meaning of the word "no" and she likes using it. I would just advise that you don't pay a lot of attention. When she throws her food on the floor don't look her in the eye when she does it. It could be she enjoys the reaction she gets. Hang in there sweetie, she'll outgrow alot of this. She just wants to be a "big girl" and is doing it the only way she knows how.

Lyr said...

It's a phase... it is! I know it. I have a suggestion though, I was watching Dr. Phil one day and I saw this book called "You're Not the Boss of Me." by betsy braun. It's amazing!!! It's about how you can BRAT PROOF your child before the age of 10! I have boys, and Jayden is doing the same thing. GET THE BOOK! ;)

Sazz said...

I rally had to laugh at the cookie NO, oh yes! lol

I;m sorry for her brattiness. K is starting to act this way so I'm really not looking forward to it.

b. lee said...

it's for sure a phase * u'll look back on it soon enuf & think, "how the crap did I get thru that??" ~ I have a 6 & 3 yr. old that surpassed it .. & am dealing with my 14 mo. old with the same rump * * hang in there, mama ... sunshine is around the corner ;)

Aleta said...

Well, now, this post is all about honesty! I like how you keep it real :)

Luci Gabel said...

Oh, my GOOOOD! I would go crazy. But it looks like there are some really good suggestions above.

Christina said...

I think they all go through the "brat stage". My son is 2 and just starting it.... My daughter is 3 1/2 and while those moments don't happen as often anymore, they tend to last longer....

Happy SITS day!

Roxanne said...

It's just a phase. Promise.

Although I'm still trying to convince myself that my own brat is only in a stage. He's almost 5. But I promise he wasn't a brat when he was your daughters age!

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