Thursday, May 5, 2011

Mom-Olympics

Sometimes being a mom can feel like a full on three-ring circus.  Sometimes it can feel like at the end of the day it we deserve a gold medal, or maybe it's a bronze sort of day.  So here are some of the "sports" I think that we should be seeing in the next Olympics.

Getting out of the house: Between packing diaper bags, making sure there's enough snacks to last for the day, finding a camera with an empty memory stick and a full battery, and remembering your wallet I feel like I'm ready to just call it a day and skip the trip all together.  Let alone dressing yourself and a toddler, or two, and getting out of the house and everyone buckled into the car seat and then realizing you forgot the sippy cup/book/wallet.  I'd get the gold in this sport.  I pack the diaper bag the night before or during nap time and get it in the car so all I need to do is grab the kid and go.

Cooking Dinner: After working all day, whether in or out of the home, dinner can seem like a chore...one that isn't really geared toward children, what with all the knives and flames, but underfoot is where many kids like to be. Or in Isabella's case, sitting on the counter so I have to constantly volley between watching the veggies and watching her.  Let me just tell you that balancing a baby on the hip and some sizzling chicken cutlets on the stove rivals any sort of long jump or track run.  If I'm going to have a temper flare up this is usually where it happens, so I've resorted to letting her chubby, germ ridden toddler hands help me cook so long as it's not dangerous.  I'd say I place bronze for this one.  I get dinner on the table every night, never on time, and never looking lovely, but it sure does taste delicious.

Planning a Night Out: Coordinating schedules of your friends or husband, finding an available sitter on a weekend, finding an outfit that fits, choosing a restaurant that suits everyone, and then actually swallowing the guilt and getting out the door.  Tough stuff.  I wouldn't even place for this one, I've been slacking big time in the "getting out" department.

Diaper Changing: In our house changing a diaper can rival alligator wrestling.  The kid is never going to be potty trained because she'd gladly sit it shit all day long.  She hides from me when it's diaper changing time.  It usually involves either an ass ton of bribes, a distraction, or a screaming toddler while I pin her down and change her.  I can do it in less than a minute...30 seconds for just pee.  I'm taking the silver.

Just so long as our Mom-Olympics doesn't turn into a Mompetition I'm down with it.
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3 comments:

Mrs. MidAtlantic said...

Diaper changing is an agility sport at our house. Not only does it include the wrestling and speed trials, there is also the delicate dance of keeping Laura's feet out of the poop!

Rachel said...

Sounds to me like you should get the gold for the diapering too! Less than a minute on the messy ones! Don't worry though I have yet to meet anyone my age still in diapers so I am sure she will eventually learn to use the potty!

Mrs. Mama said...

i couldnt agree with you more!

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