The One on Vanity

Betty White was a fox, now she's completely
unbangable

I'm not afraid to admit that I'm vain.  I think appearances are important.  I like it when my hair and make up are done (I like it, doesn't mean it always happens), I don't like to run around in sweats all day, and I love to accessorize.  I'm sure we've all spent countless hours fretting over our appearance.  Is my stomach getting pudgy?  I can't get my hair to blow out straight!  Is this lipstick too much?  Why is my chin so big?  Ugh, these bags are never going away.

Sound familiar?  Because it does to me.

But I had a thought the other day.  The thought crept in and took hold and shook me way down deep.  One day, I'll be an old lady and no one will want me.

Ummmm....truth bomb right there.

Men won't take a second glance at me, young people will call me an old lady, I won't look sexy, I won't feel sexy, I won't be beautiful.

Isn't that sad?  It makes me really sad.  It makes me understand things like botox and facelifts and tummy tucks.  You're avoiding getting to that place.

Now you can spout off about aging gracefully or growing old with your husband, but homegirl...that's not what this is about.  We're all going to be old and ugly one day and no one is ever going to want to shag us.  I'm having a really hard time coming to grips with that.  I'll just be old and dried up.  Shudders. And I'm getting closer to that point...not further away.