Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Off Balance

Balance has been my own personal Everest in my journey of motherhood.  Sometimes there are so many balls in the air that I feel like everything is a breath away from crashing down around me.  There's the full time job, the endless commute, Isabella, Andy, time with my family, time with my friends, blogging, my on-line mommy board, cooking, gym, housework, and maybe a minute for myself.  Daunting.

As the years have passed I've gotten much better at my balancing act.  I separate things into two categories:  Negotiable and Non-negotiable.  Work, commuting, Isabella, Andy, time for myself Non-negotiable.  Those categories come first and cannot be messed with...everything else is pretty much negotiable.  So basically my life works like this:  Everyday after work I come right home except for 1-2 days during the week when I hit the gym.  I try to be in the house between 5 and 5:45.  One day a week I splurge for some time just for myself.  Maybe I'll grab a mani-pedi or take a bath with a good book, maybe I'll grab a beer after work with my girlfriends or a movie with Andy.  It keeps me sane and makes me a better mother.

However, lately I feel a little off balance.  There's a lot going on right now in my life.  Two weddings that I'm a bridesmaid in, a lot of children's birthday parties, and it's doctor time (I generally cluster schedule doctor's appointments).  So I've been feeling like after work a lot of my time is getting cut away from my non-negotiables.  There's a dress fitting I need to be at, a dentist appointment that I've rescheduled 3 times, shopping for birthday presents, returning things still from Christmas, meeting with realtors.  It's like a long line of "have-to's" have invaded my life.  It's burning me out and I hate when I have to say to myself, "Just make it through this week and you're good" or "Just one more really long crappy day, and then you can come home straight from work on Thursday."

I just need to hit my stride.  I know that things come up that upset the turnip truck, but I like my predictable routine with it's balance.
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1 comments:

Caitlin MidAtlantic said...

I feel like balance is a law of averages. Sometimes things are free and easy, while other times things are all clustered and stressful. In the end, though, you meet in the middle somewhere. You balance out again... You'll get through the appointments and fittings and start finding time again!

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