Thursday, August 29, 2013

The Buffer

I'm in "mom mode" pretty much all day long.  From the second my bleary eyes open at "way-too-early"  o'clock until they slam shut at "I-should-have-been-in-bed-hours-ago" p.m there's always a butt to wipe, a nose to blow, a belly to fill, a baby to nap, and a game to play.

It's equal parts awesome and exhausting.  I love having this time off with my girls.  I love being able to hang out with Isabella and get to know Arya's budding personality, but dudes it's so draining.  Full time  stay at home mom's are society's unsung heroes for real.

And that's just when they're awake.  There are dishes to wash, laundry to fold, and spills to clean up because for the life of me I cannot manage to finish one task when the girls are awake.  It took me 3 hours (spread out) to dust the furniture yesterday.  We nixed the housekeeper for the summer because I'm off, but once September rolls around I'll have a bit of help in that area.

I need a buffer of time between mom mode and wife mode at night.

When both girls are fresh in bed and I'm still all balled up from putting Arya to sleep, because it takes about an hour and multiple pick up, put down attempts and I'm doing the dishes and Andy comes up to hug me from behind I near want to scream at the fact that there's another person touching me.  After nursing all day, baby wearing, bathing and tending to young children I'm all touched out.

I need about 30 minutes to just get my shit together, to tidy up (I cannot relax in clutter).  I need that buffer where I can read my favorite blogs, play candy crush, zone out on an episode of Orange is the New Black or just sit for a moment and thank the heavens that I survived another day.

It takes that time for me to get out of the mom zone and into the love zone.

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Transitions

I've been a bit absent from my e-life lately and I wish I could say it was because I was a prisoner of summer...sitting poolside with an ice cold beer and music playing in the background, but I'm not.  I'm right now in a world of transitions.

We're transitioning Arya from sleeping swaddled in her rock and play in our room to sleeping unswaddled in her crib and things are getting a bit hairy.  Tonight is the third night and things are finally getting a bit easier, although I don't know what the night will bring.  Yesterday it took me 2 hours to get her to go to sleep and she woke up 3 times in the night.  Not fun at all.  But she was waking up 2-3 times anyway breaking out of her swaddle, not a fun transition especially since we were used to her sleeping 7-9 hours straight and then going down for another 2-3 hour stretch.  Guess we just got spoiled.

We're getting ready to transition Isabella from long lazy days at home into going to pre-school 5 full days.  I'll admit I'm slightly in a panic about that one.  I always worry about her when she's not with me, but I know she'll do great.

I'm getting ready to transition to going back to work after a nearly 4 month maternity leave.  I'm both really excited to get back into my routine and get back to work and get a break from my girls who drive me batty, but also really anxious about being away from the little one.

I'm feeling stretched very thin these days between feeling like Arya takes up every blessed moment of my day because now apparently she needs to be held all. the time (thank God for the Ergo), feeling like a crap mom to Isabella and missing the hell out of her, this blog which is languishing (I've been meaning to write about our shore vacation and just cannot find the time to get the damned photos up), the house which is nearly always a wreck and I feel like all I do is clean up after Andy and Isabella, and trying to find time to just unwind at the end of the day.  I'm frazzled and frayed.  I need a personal assistant, a maid, and a nanny.

So that's what we're up to.  Hoping you're hanging onto your last moments of summer.

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Glasses USA

I've worn glasses since I was in the 6th grade.  I'm basically blind as a bat, like I seriously can't see the alarm clock when Arya wakes me up in the middle of the night, but it's safe to say it's somewhere between 2 and 4 am.



Lucky for me that a great pair of eyeglasses can also be an awesome fashion accessory.  You can totally rock a pair of spectacles to add a little funk and flair to your everyday look.

When looking to decide as to where to purchase an awesome pair of glasses, GlassesUSA.com is one of the best places to go looking for discount prescription eyeglasses and sunglasses.

GlassesUSA.com provides high quality optical products, including eyeglasses prescription, at discounted rates in the quickest time span possible, all over the world.  Their products are high quality, but also affordable.  They also offer a 100% satisfaction guarantee and a 110% lowest-rate guarantee.

I know that most people think that it's too difficult to order eyeglasses online because you need to spend like a zillion hours in the store trying on frames, at least that's what I do.  But with GlassesUSA there's no need for that because they have this nifty little tool called the virtual mirror where you can either upload a picture of yourself or use a webcam to take a picture and then you can "try on" as many frames as you want without leaving the couch.  It's perfect.

GlassesUSA.com is offering my shopping savy readers 10% off their order by using the code Blog10 at checkout.  Also feel free to check out the other deals they have on their website.




You can stay up-to-date on all GlassesUSA happenings through their Facebook page (http://www.facebook.com/glassesusa) and Twitter feed (@GlassesUSA).



Wednesday, August 21, 2013

And The Living Is Easy



We're currently on a family vacation at the beach and it's filled with sand, sea, and family and were having a great time! 



Be back to writing soon 

Monday, August 19, 2013

The Skinny One

The other day Isabella and I were watching Chopped while I nursed Arya.  I find it to be one of the many blessings in my life that Isabella is a hard core fan of cooking shows.  After they showed the contestants we each picked who we wanted to win.  There were four female chef's and when I asked her why she chose the one she did she said, "Because she's the skinniest, mommy, and skinniest is the best."

I wilted.

This was not happening.  I had been determined to try and raise Isabella with positive body image, to avoid labels like "fat" and "skinny" and use words such as "healthy".  I knew the world would get her eventually as she entered school and started to grow up and read magazines that were plastered with the unattainable, photoshopped images of a beauty that no woman could ever possess without the help of a computer. But I wanted to provide a solid foundation of self-worth and confidence that she could fall back on when she doubted herself the most.


Clearly I had failed. 

But where had I failed. I never called myself or other people fat in front of her. I never really commented on any ones appearance in a significant way. She clearly didn't get this from me! It must have been those pre-school teachers or my husband, not me, a woman who was purposely trying to protect her daughter from a lifetime of dreading the beach, the one place Spanx can't save you. I wanted to protect her from hating her body as I had spent an eternity hating mine. My self-worth had been tied up with the numbers on the scale and how much skin hung over the waistband of my pants since as long as I can remember; threads that were intricately and unfortunately weaved together.

My thoughts turned away from my words and towards my actions.  How many times had my daughter seen me look disapprovingly at myself in the mirror?  How many times had she seen me frown as I pinched the extra skin on the backs of my arms?  How many times had she seen me in a tizzy ripping my closet apart to find something that fit?  How often had she witnessed me sucking in my stomach and fretting over my appearance?

Too often.  Kids are perceptive and they're smart.

While my words spoke about healthy lifestyle and exercise and good food choices, my actions betrayed the fact that I really don't care about being healthy or fit or strong.  I care about being thin.  There I said it...the ugly truth.  I care about the numbers on the scale and what size jeans I can wear and how much weight I can lose.  But I don't want her to be that way.  I want her to love herself.  I want her to know how wonderful she is so that when someone tells her that she isn't she won't believe them.

I didn't know what to say to Isabella that day when she chose the skinniest chef, but I know now that it won't always matter what I say, but that the change needs to occur in my actions.


Friday, August 16, 2013

3 Months

Can you just nom on those fat cheeks?

Weight: 13 lbs

Height: 23 inches

Sleeping Habits: I say bleh to sleeping.  She's still a craptastic napper.  30-45 minutes at a clip and that's it, therefore she is taking about 4-5 naps a day.  She naps swaddled, with one arm out in her rock and play sleeper.  She is either rocked or nursed to sleep.  At night she goes to sleep between 7 and 8 pm and she wakes up, usually once, although now that we're in the growth spurt she's been getting up twice.  She wakes up in the morning around 6:30, but if I nurse her in bed sometimes she'll go back to sleep for another hour.  It's heavenly.  

Eating Habits: We are still exclusively breast feeding.  The cluster feeds in the evening have diminished quite a bit.  I feed on demand, but there's still no real schedule emerging.  Sometimes she can go 3 hours and sometimes only an hour between feeds.  If she takes a bottle of pumped milk it's usually 3-4 ounces.  

Milestones: Rolled over from belly to back on August 10, just a few days before she turned 3 months.  

Best Thing This Month: She's starting to play with toys and grab at things.  It's so cute to watch her bat and grab and play.  

Challenges This Month: The car seat.  Home girl hates it.  She screams bloody murder at the top of her friggen lungs unless I'm back there letting her suck on my inverted pinky since she doesn't take a paci.  I'm hoping that she's gonna grow out of this soon because I feel like a prisoner.  

Looking Forward To: Next week we're going on vacation with my parents and the kids and I can not wait.  I'm not expecting it to be a relaxing beach vacation, but I could do with a change of scenery!

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Ways to Know You're In Your 30's

1.  It takes less time to recover from minor surgery than it does to recover from a night out of drinking.

2.  Sleeping until 9 am means "sleeping in"

3.  When you were in elementary school you had to use the Encyclopedia Britannica

4.  Growing up you couldn't use the phone and the Internet at the same time

5.  Your IG and FB are full of pictures of your kids

6.  You think nothing of writing a facebook status on your kids potty training habits.

7.  When someone says "popples" you totally know what they mean

8.  When you wear high heels your knees hurt for three days

9.  You prefer a good Cabernet to a shot of tequila

10.  You went to see Jurassic Park in the movie theatre at least 3 times

11.  A night out now requires a pair of Spanx, a babysitter, and a 10 pm curfew.

12.  Your closet has a lot less spandex than it used to

13.  Your nights end at 11pm instead of start

14.  You'd prefer to buy a new lamp for your house than a new dress

15.  You watch a lot more HGTV and a lot less MTV

16.  When you browse through current magazines you have no idea who half the celebrities are, but you know the entire cast of "Austin and Alley"

17.  Your Spring Break song is now considered an "oldie"

18.  When you're up at 3 am it's with a crying baby instead of a hangover

19.  Your friends don't think it's weird at all to compare labor and delivery stories over lunch

20.  You consider a day successful if everyone has been fed and avoided a trip to the ER

21.  In your medicine cabinet you can find firming cream, wrinkle  reducer, and eye cream.

22.  You open your mouth and your mothers voice comes out

23.  You need to pop an Advil before you go out dancing

24.  You can find enough Cheerio's in the back seat of your car to feed a family of four.

25.  You finally learned how to dress for your body

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Watch Me Write

Here are some posts I've written over at Parent Society...come and show me some love with comments, likes, shares, tweets, and pins.  Or you can just totally ignore me and I'll still love you.

5 Ways to Spot a Sanctimommy - we all know "those" moms right?  Well they hate me because I apparently spoil motherhood with my keen dislike of dirty diapers.

Lessons For the First Time Mom- just some guiding principles to get the new mom through the bumpy first few months of motherhood.

5 Things Kids Ruin and Why It's Ok - kids ruin a ton of of crap, but it's not all bad!

7 Worst Things About Being a Mompoop and boogers are right up there on the top of the list along with stretch marks and a devolving social life.

Also, while I have your attention I just joined Stitch Fix so if you would like to join pleas use my referral link: http://stitchfix.com/sign_up?referrer_id=3147177

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Shabby Apple Giveaway

Win this dress
Since the last giveaway I did with Shabby Apple was such a success I think I'll just go ahead an host another one even though inside I'm seething that I cannot win my own giveaway because Shabby Apple is the number one source for vintage clothing.

Not only do they have amazing vintage style dresses, but they also have amazing shoes, accessories, swimsuits and even maternity wear!  I've been a fan of Shabby Apple for a long time and I'm actually using one of their dresses as a "prize" for myself once I get down to my pre-pregnancy weight.  Hopefully it's sometime soon.

One of you lucky duck readers have a chance to win this amazing dress called Dressage.  Isn't it just to die for?  Perfect with a pair of tall boots for fall or you could dress it up with a pair of pumps.  It's so pretty you could pair it with a statement necklace and flats.  Love everything about this dress!

Enter here to win!


a Rafflecopter giveaway

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Getting Easier

Things seem like they are leveling off a bit around here. While Arya is not so much following a schedule, she's definitely fallen into a loosely predictable routine.  She wakes up for the day around 6:30 (give or take a half an hour), eats and we play (or she plays in her swing/gym while I prop my eyes open with toothpicks and drink coffee) then she's down for her first nap around 8:15.

She still only sleeps for about 45 minutes (grrrrrrr) but there's not much I can do about that unfortunately but she won't go back down at all.  She follows that routine for the most of the day and we try and get outside for a walk or in the pool or out for ice cream or whatever at least once a day if not more.  Since the naps are so short she'll take around 4 of them.

So I'm just kind of rolling with her routine and not being a slave to the schedule like I was with Isabella.  If she naps in the stroller, so be it.  If she goes to bed one night at 7pm and the next night at 8 pm, I'm fine with it.  We go out to dinner without obsessively watching the clock.  If she fusses I don't get worked up into a tizzy like I did the first go around.

I won't say that I never get frustrated because I hit my limit at least once a day, but she's starting to space out her nursing sessions and she's becoming a more efficient nurser so I don't feel tethered to her all day long.  I'm also not being such a super freak about her taking a bottle here and there.  We had a house full of people this weekend for an epic playdate and I just didn't feel like nursing so Andy gave her a bottle of expressed breastmilk and the world didn't fall off it's axis.

Everyday gets a little bit easier and I find myself a little less tense.

Monday, August 5, 2013

The Seven Year Itch

Not around here!  Today is mine and Andy's seven year wedding anniversary and I really am just so happy.  He knows how bat shit crazy I can be and totally knows how to work around it.  He understand when I need a break.  He understands the bizarre things that give me anxiety and totally compensates for me.

He never puts his keys in the draw and he leaves 4 pairs of shoes by the door and he has clutter blindness and couldn't care less if the floors are clean and he cares way too much about what I eat and if I exercise and he never puts things together when he says he will but every night he pours me a glass of wine and we watch TV together.  Every day he tells me to sit and finish my coffee while he walks with a fussy baby.  He loves our girls so fiercely that it doesn't leave much room for disappointment that he'll never have a son.  He makes my lunch and deals with insurance companies and lets me completely fall apart when I need to.

We've been down roads that we never thought we'd find our way back from, but we always come back to each other.

We've been through loss, buying a house, selling a house, buying another one, we have two beautiful physical manifestations of our love, we've worried about money, we've traveled, we've stayed up all night talking, we've given each other the silent treatment.  We know how to fight and we know how to love.  We've built a wonderful life together brick by brick.  I love where we've been.  I love where we are and I can't wait to see where we go.  I also can't wait to see if he'll ever clean up his clutter.  Here's to seven more years of nagging.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Confessions

It's been a while since I've had a good old fashioned mind dump here on the good old blog.  So let's get to it.

I hate baby stuff.  Not the cute little outfits or the crib or the car seat, but all the other "stuff" that babies amass.  Like the boppy that is always in the middle of the floor or the swings, play mats, and bouncy seats that I'm always tripping over.  Every where I look there's stuff!  And I know what you're going to say...one day she'll be big and you'll look back on it and miss it.  Maybe, but today is not that day. I've found keeping a pretty basket in each room as a sort of "catch all" for all of the loose toys and bibs and such helps a lot.

baby stuffI loathe pumping.  Like I seriously hate it, but I also have a bizarre obsession with stockpiling breast milk.  Andy and I are going away for 2 days for our anniversary so I know I needed a stash for that, but I have over 100 ounces and I'm still pumping every night "just in case".  We went out to dinner the other day and I pumped right before we left this way if Arya got fussy when we were eating, Andy could give her a bottle so I didn't have to nurse in the restaurant.  She got fussy so we warmed up the bottle and then she didn't drink it.  I almost cried to waste the ounces.

I love nursing Arya to sleep for naps and at night.  It's so much easier than rocking her to sleep for naps, but I'm super nervous that when I go back to work in September she's not going to go to sleep for Andy or my mom when they try to put her down for a nap.  I feel like I'm being lazy and maybe I should teach her how to self-soothe on her own.  I'm worried I'm creating bad habits, but it's so easy and she's so sweet when she falls asleep.

I'm not a big fan of the newborn stage.  She's so cute and cuddly but a lot of work and not a lot of reward.  I like babies when they get a bit of "heft" to them.  Like around 6 months old when they're in a more structured routine and they can sit up and you really see their personality.  But, if I'm being honest, I like them the best when they're out of diapers and sleeping through the night!  That's my favorite stage.

I am so done having kids.  My family feels complete and I cannot fathom the idea of being pregnant again or having another newborn.  It doesn't make me sad or nostalgic.  I know I'm done and we're looking into a more permanent form of birth control.  I know Andy would have loved a son but I feel very whole with my two little girls.

Arya's 45 minute naps are destroying me!  You know what you can get done in 45 minutes?  Nothing.  Thank God she sleeps decent at night.

Sometimes I feel like a brand new, first time mom, completely insecure and worried about everything.

I am pretty terrified of unswaddling Arya and getting her into her own room.  Can one of you come and handle that for me?